note to this moment

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20140619-105847.jpgDear present moment,

My eyes have been red for the past month — sometimes from dryness of the sun and the heat, sometimes from tears, sometimes from the long hours I have required of my contacts.

I can feel the fatigue ebbing and flowing in my veins. I can see my to do list growing longer, not shorter. There are fewer check marks by that list that I would prefer.

I can feel the sorrow and uncertainty gnawing on my peripheral consciousness. I am worried for the man who was always a source of strength, from my time as a little girl with pig tails to the woman I have become. There has always been more heartbreak mixed in with the adventure than I would like. But this kind is contains a special suppressed panic. I am so scared. I am so scared.

I can feel the the weeks slipping by too quickly. They are like sand in my fingers, pulling from my reach. Disappearing into the anonymity of the sea shore.

I can feel the joy, in the thick of it all. I can feel His whisper, telling me yet again to trust Him.

I wish that I could freeze you, stretch you into something longer. So I could get it all done. So I could dance with him a little longer in the midst of his uncertain future. So I could relish the sunshine and the trees and the mountains more. So I could listen closer for His voice.

If you could pause, just for a moment.




4 thoughts on “note to this moment

    Lisa M said:
    June 20, 2014 at 1:36 pm

    I don’t know the secret of this letter, but I love it. It is beautifully written and expresses emotion so well.

      awyman responded:
      June 20, 2014 at 1:43 pm

      Thank you. 🙂

    Love Happy Notes - Daily Fun and Inspiration said:
    June 21, 2014 at 9:33 am

    Wonderful writing. I enjoyed it very much.

    Karuna said:
    June 27, 2014 at 9:17 pm

    You really make the emotions palpable.

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